Creamer with a Hint of Coffee

Odd title, yes? I know. I’m strange, but that’s a good thing, right? Especially for a blogger because otherwise you all might be BORED TO TEARS while reading my blog. Well, okay. I shouldn’t oversell my oddness, I’m not really that odd. In fact in some ways I’m actually pretty normal in most aspects of my life … but WAIT … OH MY … what did I do? I just completely derailed the opening paragraph of this blog post.


Before I attempt, fruitlessly, to get this back on track I suppose I should explain the title. I love coffee creamer, especially of the hazelnut variety and especially if it’s from Lucerne. I love it so much that I usually put a pretty hefty amount of creamer into my coffee, especially of the iced variety. So naturally my wife always likes to give commentary on my coffee drinking habits by asking “Are you going to have any coffee with your creamer?”

You see, I’m that guy who likes coffee, but doesn’t like coffee. I can’t drink it black, nor with only sugar and milk. There needs to be some flavor there to mask the bitterness. Now don’t get me wrong, I still appreciate the bitterness of coffee, but I just like there to be something there worth it, preferably hazelnutty which is another short anecdotal story that I feel like sharing.

See, I’m sharing. It’s the Nevik sharing the semi-intimate details of his life post that everyone craves every now and then. Right? The sweet nutty details of my inner-workings should give everyone a better insight to just how goofy and odd I can be.

Anyhoo, back to the anecdote.

Prior to meeting my wife I was a french vanilla guy. Wait, no not that far back. My transition to a hazelnut guy was a bit more recent with the purchase of my home. French vanilla was my go-to when it came to coffee flavors. I think back in those days I was a bit more outwardly odd with happily dying my hair every shade of the rainbow (not all at once, mind you) and blasting industrial bands such as Front 242, Wumpscut, and Ministry out of my car so craving something so vanilla was my balance in life.

Did I just equate coffee to being my balance? Whoa. That’s not right. I didn’t even drink a whole lot of coffee back then, but when I did, it was flavored with french vanilla.

WAIT. I’m forgetting something.

I didn’t just jump from french vanilla to haznelnut. No, no I did not. I think there was a vanilla caramel phase that bridge that gap. Yet that doesn’t explain how I got there and why I mentioned my wife as being instrumental in my becoming a hazelnut guy. See, at the time my wife was all about hazelnut creamer in her coffee and one day she secretly conspired to make me love hazelnut too.

Okay, I’m fibbing. She didn’t force me to like it. I tried it once and thought “hmmm, this is pretty tasty” but didn’t instantaneously convert. It took several weeks, if not months, before I fully switched over and now that I have, I can never go back. Believe me, I’ve tried. There’d be those moments at work when ALL THE HAZELNUT was gone and all that was left was french vanilla. Yah, those were not good moments at work, which reminds me of one other important fact: I despire room temperature Coffeemate creamers. They’re horrid. Pretty much Lucerne or go home for me.

Yes, I’m odd and this post was purely inspired by my iced hazelnut coffee that I consumed while writing this. Thank you iced hazelnut coffee, you’re the best. You really are.